We’re having a baby!
8 years ago yesterday, on 10/10/10 at 10:10 AM I married the love of my life. But it was a miracle she stayed with me, I was NOT an easy partner in our early years.
We went through trial after trial, particularly inner struggles. Having grown up in a “challenged” home I brought a lot of baggage to the marriage.
Then there were the financial difficulties, a business that tanked, a book deal gone bad, and a behemoth of an elephant that sat on our chests.
Then there was the mold toxicity, and the house in Maui that near ate us alive.
Through it all she stayed by my side.
No matter what happened, Jessica stayed with. Sure, she threatened to leave, she just wanted, and needed, and demanded more. And she deserved it.
And it took years for me to give her that. Sure I was trying, but it took a lot of repair work to be ready for her, and even more work, to help her heal from our wounds.
They say our partners are our greatest teachers, and I must say Jessica has been mine.
Through it all, I’ve done my best to improve, to grow, and to be the best version of me I could be.
That’s why I’m so thrilled that now, nearly 10 years after we met, and exactly 8 years after we married, I feel ready to have a baby.
We found out just last week Jessica’s pregnant…a week ago today to be exact. And for the first time in my life I feel ready to have a baby.
I feel I’ve done the inner work–which I humbly continue to do, and will continue to do on a daily basis for the rest of my life. For I know I’m a work in progress–perhaps we all are.
But I continue to meditate, and do automatic writing, to listen to my soul and the highest wisdom above, and to teach, to coach, and to listen, and I challenge myself, and learn on a daily basis.
And I am open. The more I learn the more I discover how little I truly know, but I am open, and bring kindness, and compassion, and a sense of gentleness to whatever I do.
And so I feel ready. I know there’ll be challenges ahead, I know there’ll be good times, and difficult times. And I know our baby girl, or baby boy for that matter, will be my greatest teacher.
But I look forward to it, not in a “bring it on” sort-of way, but in the way one starts into any great endeavor, or school for that matter. Nervous, but excited, ready to see what comes our way.
It’s one week in since we found out, and I’m starting this blog to document my journey into fatherhood. I cannot promise it’ll be perfect–actually, I guarantee it’ll be far from it. As I run a daily show, I’ll have just a few minutes each morning to write.
But I promise it’ll be open, honest, and from the heart. I want to share my journey, in case it helps and inspires you. It’s kind-of scary, because it’ll be raw, I won’t have the time to edit or censor myself, and I wouldn’t want to either. I want to share my emotions, my experiences, in the hope it’ll help you too.
And on that note, my precious kitty, the youngest of three, The Love Bug, has just jumped out of my lap. That means it’s time for me to get up, get our smoothies made…yay fresh fruits, vegetables, and seeds, and head for the gym.
There’s nothing like getting the body moving, to refresh the mind, and get the day started!
I wish you the most beautiful new day ahead, and I’ll do my best to post more tomorrow.
Keep shining bright!!!!!
Yours in service, gratitude, kindness, and compassion, Michael.